Crazy Kids

At some point, Mr. Smith started referring to our offspring as The Crazy Kids.

Grand Master H took this monicker as a compliment and decided to run with it. He now refers to himself and his sister as The Crazy Kids, as if they are some crime-fighting duo, rather than the two person crime wave that they really are.

He refers to them in the third person which makes the situation even more hilarious. As in, “Crazy Kids never give up.”

He has even gone so far as to start building what he refers to as Crazy Kid Inventions. They are his own creations, mostly constructed of Lego bricks. His master work thus far has been the Crazy Kid Machine to keep Dada (Mr. Smith) from Working Ever Again.

I know, we need to work on the title…too wordy.

He delivers this information with great flare and drama. I have to give him credit.

He starts out with a normal tone of voice and at the end, yells, superhero/villain style, throws both arms in the air and looks skyward. As in, “I will never let Dada work again in California, FOREVER!”

He may have watched too many Ultraman videos at this point to be saved.

In our ongoing battle to get these children to sleep past 5:00 am, Mr. Smith suggested keeping them up later than usual.

6:15 pm: Famous Baby C starts asking for her bath.

6:20 pm: Baby C asks for her bath again. When we inform her that it is too early, she runs down the hall, throws herself on the floor face down and begins wailing that she wants her “BAAAAAAAAATHHH!”

6:23 pm: Because of our refusal to start her bath, C is sobbing by the bathroom door, pleading for her bath.

6:24 pm: Grand Master H goes to investigate because he feels that he can make the situation better somehow.

6:25 pm: I say to Mr. Smith, trying to add some humor to the situation, “Crazy kids never give up.”

6:25 pm: Grand Master H adds, slightly puzzled, “Crazy kids don’t understand.”

When I try to explain the situation to him, that they are killing us, little by little, by not sleeping later in the morning, he comes very close, pokes me in the chest for emphasis, and says, “Oh, I see, you want us to sleep later in the morning!”

He then steps back and says, “But we will NEVER!”

Thrust both arms up, shouts to the heavens (William Shatner style).

I am defeated.

I beg Mr. Smith to agree to starts baths.

We are both defeated.

They are both in bed by 7:15.

Baby C is back up by 3:15. His Lordship, the Grand Master H, by 4:30.

Anybody want a couple of Crazy Kids?

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